Дневникът на една търсачка

1. Values and beliefs – source of cusses and failure in life

2. We give labels of different levels of pain and different levels of pleasure and those levels we called values

3. We learn in life to take different words that we called emotions and give them level of importance = to value different emotions with different levels of intensity

4. Hierarchy of importance = values that are guiding our every day focus (values that cause pleasure or pain)



Moving towards values                     Moving away from values
States create pleasure                    States that we try to avoid

5. Valuing experiences = is this going to leave pleasure or pain according to your levels of importance

6. If you know the person’s value (main focus) you can predict his overall the basic direction of his life

7. If we change the importance of values that will change the priority in one’s life, his personality, behavior, destiny, the way hi evaluate everything

8. Our life is shaped by what we want most, but also what we fear most

- Person’s present value
- What do you want most in life
- What are the things he is trying to avoid
- What ate the triggers cause someone to feel good or bad
- What are the rules he has for these values
- Design life’s purpose = what is most important to you
- Make new values that will pull you towards your goals, purpose

9. Sometimes values pull us apart, they are in conflict and we sabotage ourselves = the Gary Hart syndrome

10. Power of understanding your values and using them (Why? – to know the focus of your brain)

11. Key:


NB: Family is MEANS value (you don’t need family, but the state you will have by having one – love, security, closeness, spiritual connection ….)- Values to an end
We need to understand END values

12. Where did the values come on the first place? - as a result of mismatch of a human experience, they come out of pain and pleasure

13. Who you are around on a consistent basis shape your values

14. Value is the target, but knowing that you hit the target – that is based on your beliefs

15. Belief – generalization you have made of what have to happen for you to experience a certain result in your life

16. We make rules ..”if ….then …” within yourself

17. We may have same values but different rules what has to happen for those things to be met

18. You cannot lose motivation if you feel too successful, you lose it if you are too comfortable

19. You have to enjoy the process not just ger5tting in the “place”

20. Every state, all the values that you want, you can have right now

21. All the emotions are physiological storms in the brain



I. Global (giant generalizations that you have made for your life in the form of:
“Life is …………….”
“People are …………..”
“I am …………………….”

II. Rules
“If ……then ……….”
“If you love me, then do this”

22. The belief you have determine the question you ask

23. Everyone has his own rules

24. Change some of your core beliefs, adopt new ones

25. Distinguish is power

Today’s assignment:
1. What is most important to me in my life? (Ends values, not family, money, etc, but what state they give you). Rate them from 1 to 10
2. What are the emotions I’d do almost anything to avoid? Rate from 1 to 10
3. What has to happen to feel ……. (values in question 1 and 2)

1. Second way to change state is to change the focus of your mind

2. Define your state = what you are paying attention right now

3. How you succeed → change mental focus → change your state → change how you behave

4. You can control your state in 2 ways:
- WHAT we are focusing on (what we are picturing, saying, what we are paying attention in our physical body)
OR
- HOW we are focusing (brightness of the pictures in our mind, dimensions, volume, colors)

5. Conscious mind cannot take everything simultaneously , so many things are happening that we do not pay attention to them

6. People are deletion creatures - moist of us, most of the time, we delete/ignore/fail to pay attention most of what is going around

7. What is the price of deletion? – we walk around hallucinating that our experience of the world is real

8. KEY to make your life party that you are happy with: focus on something even small but nice and make it bigger and brighter

9. Quality of life = quality of the state you live day to day
- How you use your body ( develop new habits)
- What and how you focus on things

10. No matter how good it is you can always focus on something that it is not perfect or does not meet your expectations = ultimate failure in life

11. Success – creating consistent pleasure in your life and cause yourself to grow

12. What determine your focus = how value things (the way we value things determine the way we feel)

13. What is valuation = nothing but questions

14. Thinking is a process of evaluating things (what this means to me and what I should do)

15. If you ask questions with absolute expectations and consistently and give your brain enough time to search an answer – you will get an answer

16. Certain questions make you feel certain way

17. Pre-supposition – you are presupposing that things in the question are already happened to you even if not real but the brain will get an answer (ex: why this is always happened to me?)

18. Lousy questions = lousy answers (ex: why am I fat? – guarantee you will stay fat)

19. Better quality questions = better quality answers (ex: how can I become thin? Or more: how can I become thinner and enjoy the process)

20. Quality of life = quality of the questionsyou ask on a daily basis

21. Use questions to change focus


22. Questions do 3 things:
- Instantly change focus and the way we feel
- Change what we are deleting
- Get access to resources within yourself

23. What you are most happy in your life right now (or could be happy if you want to)? How does it make you feel?
What you are really excited in your life?
What you are really grateful for in your life?
What you are proud for in your life?
What you love most in your life and who loves you?

24. Formula of wealth – live every day in an attitude of gratitude

Today's Assignment: 
Design 5 questions that will give you reasons to feel phenomenal
Develop new habit which will associate powerful emotions with waking up in the morning: answer these 5 questions and create the feeling
Write down in your journal what is happening every day. Any change in your attitude, I your relationships, communications? Notice growth

1. First step to get what you want is to know what you want

2. Some think they want better relationship, better job, etc. but people do not want money or relationships, they do not want to be thinner, what they really want are the thinks they will get from those changes in life

3. Everything you want in life comes to 1 thing: to change the way you feel: so called change of state

4. We want to feel good, we want to manage our emotions

5. To change your behavior is to change how you feel

6. What is the difference between a time when you act brilliantly and when you act brutally: it is not your ability but your state of mind and body is in at that time

7. What people can do is different from what they will do and the difference is not their capability but their state

8. To create the power of joy and passion is to learn to manage your state of mind. If you do not manage your emotional state that will cost you everything in life – friends, family, success, joy on a daily basis

9. What happened on a daily basis around us do not determine how you feel

10. How you feel at any moment in time is purely designed from how you are directing your mind and body in that moment

11. No matter what happen in your life you are in control of your state

12. In order to feel something, you feel it through your neuro system, through your body

13. The way we move, our facial muscles, the way we gesture, the way we talk and walk determinate how we feel

14. To change your state – change the way you are moving

15. Breather, stand up, smile

16. Any change in your physical body makes immediately change in your state

17. Determinate your level of passion and joy from 0 to 10 every day


Reason: emotion is created by motion

1. Speed your movements, change intensity
- Power move – a gesture to use no matter how bad you feel to instantly feel strong, to feel that you can turn the things around. You already made them: in times when you feel great (how you move then)
*Exercise: Walk as you usually walk; now imagine that you feel absolutely strong and unstoppable and walk around in this state of power. See how your gesture differently
2. Change your breathing
3. Manipulate your face
4. Control your diet

Today’s assignment:
Focus on emotion “Passion”
1. Talk about something that you believe in, but in a dispassionate way – what you do when you are not passionate (watch your tone, face, movements) for 2-3 min
2. Change state: talk in a passionate way – notice how you move differently, remember your face, where are your hands, head
3. Change two states for some times

1. Suffering without reason = ultimate pain
2. Give reason, give meaning
3. If you associate something to “I gave up from something” = massive pain
4. Changing the association is what all therapies do when they work
5. The time needed for change depends on the level of commitment to that change
6. You have to condition yourself every single day to give your best, to feel your best
7. Condition yourself = lifestyle



I. Get leverage on yourself – get to the point where something must change, you must change it and you can change it right now. Get to the point where you feel that not changing will be painful and to change means pleasure
COULD/SHOULD/OUGHT = not enough to create a change

II. Interrupt present limiting association

III. Condition yourself to have a new association, an empowering one

Today’s assignment:
1. 10 reasons you must do 4 actions that you need to do (include what will cost you if you do not and all the great stuff you will get by doing it
2. Write 4 or 5 ways you can interrupt you negative patterns
3. Create a new association to the change you want – think of all the pleasure that you have when you change, feel it, enjoy it ......


Book: Man’s search for meaning/ Viktor Frankl

1. What controls our life is the meaning that we give to a given situation

2. If you associate to be married to a lack of freedom = that will create a problem in the relationship

3. To change our life = to change our Neuro Associations

4. How to condition ourselves so we associate things in a way so it makes feel and behave in a way we want to

5. Positive thinking is nice but not enough because the only problem with positive thinking is you have to think about it

6. We have to change our condition responses to the environment

7. NA create our motivational levels, what we are willing to do or not do

8. Every single action as small as it seems has an effect on your life

9. With changing what we link to things, we can change our destiny, our behavior, because our destiny is based on our daily behavior


10. What is the ultimate destiny I want? → You have to think how to create it: what I have to believe, to act on a daily basis now

11. When you feel strong feelings whatever is happening around you consistently at that moment usually get linked to it (that is called anchor)

12. In the minute you notice your past negative Neuro Associations, you can change them. Awareness is curative sometimes.

13. A lot of our Neuro Associations have no basis in reality, they feel real to us, but they are totally disempowering because they have nothing to do with what actually do on.

14. We are always anchoring things together; we are always creating Neuro Associations in our minds

1. 3 NA that you’ve made in the past that shaped you positively
2. 3 NA that you’ve made in the past that limit you even today